Forgotten
I think I’ve forgotten who I am, or who I thought I would be; the person I was going to become back when I dreamed of a future with endless possibilities.
In recent months I’ve started writing again, reconnecting with that long-lost love of spilling my thoughts out into written form. I thought that was it. I’d looked within and found what I love and missed in my life. Turns out there’s a bit more to uncover when I dug a little deeper.
I discovered the rest after a late-night discussion with my daughter where we were talking about all the things she could do with her future. In the process we got talking about what I thought I’d grow up and do, back when I was in school. Writing was still the first thing that came to mind, but then I remembered all the other options I’d considered.
My Year 11 work experience was spent at an Alternative Therapies clinic, getting to see and experience firsthand things like Acupuncture and Chinese Medicine. Turns out I’m not great with needles (even those tiny ones). Then I considered Nutrition, only to realise that I don’t really want to know the nutritional value of foods like chips and chocolate when I plan on eating then anyway. And there were the usual, glamorous options like hairdresser, photographer and makeup artist, all of which I have no actual talent for.
Coming out of high school with no set direction, I started a Bachelor of Arts before quickly switching to a Bachelor of Tourism. I took electives that I found interesting, like psychology and criminology. Each one highlighted key elements that I couldn’t get past if I wanted to make a career out of them (like a whole lot of science for psychology). I also found things that I was good at (but forgot about) like linguistics. After finishing my degree I was offered a Masters in Linguistics, but quickly turned it down and didn’t give it another thought. So I stumbled through my education and out into the workforce, doing what I was good at and not necessarily what I wanted.
Which is where I find myself today, but now I have a list of all those long-forgotten interests that I can look at with fresh eyes and reconsider in all their various forms, which is exciting. And who knows where it might lead.
What I’m saying is don’t just look inwards, but maybe look backwards as well. Remember all those other dreams you pushed aside and take another look at them. You never know - you may just uncover something that could bring a whole lot of joy into your life.
